Postpartum care!

Ok girls.  Postpartum stuff is not really talked about, but I am about to discuss some things.  Beware of TMI, but after having a baby and your vajayjay exposed to 8 people, modesty has flown out the window.


1.  Bleeding.  After you deliver, it is like a period on steroids.  You continue to bleed and have lochia(postpartum discharge stuff) for about 6 weeks.

2.  Mesh panties and GINORMO pads. To accommodate the period roidage you have to wear the biggest maxi pad ever made.  It's like wearing a depends without the sticky tabs and the nurse wiping your butt. To hold the pad you get to wear the Postpartum Secrets.  They are these fabulous boy short mesh panties that the hospital so graciously gives you to wear and take some home.  LOVELY!

3. Taking care of the goods.  Because you are sore and stitched, you have this routine given to you every time you go to the bathroom.  EVERY time, and I mean every time, you go pee for the next 6 weeks you have to take the BOTTLE.  The BOTTLE(my nurse named my BOB the BOTTLE) is filled with warm water to, for better words, squirt yourself clean.  The hospital gave me this cold spray, tucks pads, and this foam ointment.  This is all to help you heal and not get infected during the healing process.

4.  Not allowed to do anything!  I'm not allowed to lift anything heavier than Ava or do much of anything for 2 weeks.  That is very hard to do when you feel fine, but after doing minor things your body will tell you when it is doing more than you are supposed to. (Hence more bleeding!)

5.  Bowel movement.  The hospital gives you stool softeners while you are in the hospital and then they send some home with you.  With all of the drugs and with labor your body has a hard time doing the doo!  Well, they do not tell you that it could be the worst doo EVER.  I felt like I needed an epidural to get through it!  I did not know either that with the horrible experience, you are liable to get (if you don't already have them) HEMMORRHOIDS.  I have a glorious one on top(I guess I could say on bottom =/ ) of all of the new bodily functions that go with labor.

These are things that happened to me.  I am just informing you of things that could or possibly happen, NOT WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU.  Every woman's experience is different.  Although, postpartum isn't all that it is cracked up to be, look what I got in return....

WAY WORTH EVERYTHING!!!